Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Greetings from The Road

Well here I sit in my lovely hotel suite with about an hour on my hands. I have been out-and-about visiting my favorite blogs - check out MonkeyGirl's latest controversial post with 47 comments (and one new, uhm, Interesting Blog). I can't decide if "The Dawn" is for real or if she really just has mixed-type delusional disorder...regardless her brand-spankin'-new blog should provide for some amusement, albeit possibly the eye-rolling kind.

Back already? Ok, here we go!

I am at an Embassy Suites which I am sure would be the Dollar General of hotels to The Dawn. Certainly she only stays at Ritz-Carltons or elitist (AHEM...) EXCLUSIVE resorts where she can make sure her Rolex is properly safeguarded and her anthropologist-cum-rock-star husband can find a secluded retreat from the flock of passenger pigeons that inevitably follow him everywhere. Oh, I forgot, they're extinct. Likely at the hand of The Dawn.

I am at the dollar general hotel chain in pursuit of education "[ej-oo-key-shuh n]." Although I was NOT the valedictorian of my class, and my friends (yes I had them and still do!) are not flipping burgers anywhere (they are all quite successful, thank you), I have managed to scrape together the relatively puny (compared to The Dawn) complement of brain cells I was born with and make something of myself. Although I was an ICU nurse for 6 years, and a cardiac electrophysiology nurse for the last 6 years, I am taking a refresher course over the next 6 weeks in cardiac electrophysiology.

That's where we go up into people's hearts and purposefully try to put them into malignant and/or lethal arrhythmias, study those arrythmias while making sure the patient doesn't die on the table, make three-dimensional geometric maps of the heart chamber, and voltage-time maps that we can superimpose upon this gathered geometry, creating a very good picture of what exactly is happening in this patient's heart. Then we burn the culprit area, do some follow up testing, and more often than not the patient goes home and never has the same heart problem again.

Shucks, I know I'm no Personal Injury Attorney, but Darn it, I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and gosh darn it....people LIKE me.

Providing services that help doctors save lives, or bilking honest hardworking folks out of money they don't have because a "client" suffered whiplash (*gasp!*) and emotional distress (*wail!*)?
I'm torn, but I'm going to have to go with Saving Lives.

Before anyone gets their size-zero panties in a bunch, I know that there are people out there with legitimate claims, and I know The Dawn helps them too. But I can HONESTLY say I have never provided my services to dramatize and inflate claims of "personal injury" at the expense of an innocent someone-else.

Looking down from her lofty moral high ground as she does on my sister-in-the-trenches MonkeyGirl, maybe The Dawn can say that too.

"But..." you say.
Ok, taxpayers don't count. It's not my choice to give healthcare to our country's orange-jumpsuited, shackled and cuffed "sickly" who are frequently looking for a vacation from the Big House and the guaranteed attention of any female, attractive or not. But it's my professional obligation. And I do it with an outward smile.

Then vent in a HIPPA-compliant fashion.


Tiff said...

Please - everybody vents about their job at some time or another. And a lot of people vent in a public forum such as a blog - it's part of the reason some people have them. That doesn't mean that in real life they treat their patients/customers/clients without respect and compassion. It just means that at times they get frustrated and need to let it out.

Tiff said...

When I said everybody vents I probably misspoke. I'm sure The Dawn never has.

Nurse K said...

Thank your for, as Scalpel said, the dictionary assist on the big word there. When you get over 3 syllables, everything starts going to the shitter in rapid fashion.

Mom In Scrubs said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kacey said...

Great specialty. We have a great-niece, who just had that done in Tampa on the 1st of Feb. She is only sixteen and was told after the oblation that she probably wouldn't have lived through another episode of 325 beats per min. that happened at school in December. I can't help but wonder what would have happened if she had had an episode while alone, instead of in dance class at school. God bless the new technology and to heck with The Dawn.

Mom In Scrubs said...

Thanks Kacey - I am so glad your daughter is ok; ablation rocks!

Mom In Scrubs said...

woops, great-niece! Sorry Kacey - come back anytime!

SUV MAMA said...

Yo Mama- you rock my world.

So, I have intelligent comments, but I've been drinking a few glasses of wine, so will ya give me until tomorrow?

Just wanted to let you know I'm here, not MIA, and I love reading your writing, and it requires a sober response. *HIcccuppp*

Mom In Scrubs said...

Enjoy the wine, mama, and sleep well. I can't wait to hear what you say!

Monnik said...

The Dawn is really A Troll. Which is what Internet geeks like me call shitstirrers. The more fuel you feed her, the more she'll keep spewing.

But she is rather amusing.

Monnik said...

dude. email me your new email address... are you still awake?

to this email below: