I had one of THOSE moments this evening. A "Holy Crap-A-Moly" moment. One of those incidents that get stuck in your head for a long time based solely on that initial impact, the "BAM!;" not a-la Emeril Legasse but more a-la a speeding cement truck that you mosey-ed in front of.
I was at the a pizza restaurant tonight, getting the kids settled, barking orders and trying to get them to SIT ON YOUR BUTT, BOTH CHEEKS ON THE CHAIR, STOP TOUCHING EACH OTHER OR YOU'LL BOTH BE EATING IN THE TRUNK OF THE CAR SO HELP ME GOD!! You know, the usual. I was looking around for JeepMan and couldn't find him, so I headed over to the salad bar. Some guy bumped into me and I said "Excuse me..."
That's when the cement truck splatted me.
You see, in my mind, this "guy" that I had only half-paid attention to was "older," as in about 10 years older than me. He was going seriously gray and was stooped over (the salad bar, that is). I just blew him off as "some older dude."
It was JeepMan. And when I realized that I hadn't recognized my own husband because he looked too old to be my husband...you guessed it. BAM!
Wow...I'm still sort of reeling. 'Cause you see, if he looks older than I think he should look, then it stands to reason that I must be the same. Damn. That sucks rocks. (sigh)
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On a funny note, I made a statement tonight that I could have never, ever, in a million years predicted that I would say:
"Stop Drinking Your Potatoes. That's rude."
What the???? Well it makes perfect sense when you know that Lulu had a cup of potatoes and gravy (watery potatoes and thin gravy) and she insisted on mixing them up into "potato pudding." The consistency was such that it didn't really want to stay on her spoon, so I suppose it made sense to her to drink them.
Ugh. I just had a total-body-grossed-out-shiver.
Maybe if I can I'll continue this theme for some short and sweet posts in the future.
I'll call it "Things I Never Thought I'd Need To Say."
Or something like that.
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10 comments:
If it makes you feel better, I don't think you look much older than me. And I totally look 21.
JM isn't that gray is he? Doc is also going gray, he just keeps his hair so short you can't tell.
Poor JM. I've noticed this sort of thing too but I always remind myself that he's four and a half years older so that's OK. Thing is - he doesn't look it but I do!
Here's a tip - NEVER look down over a mirror. Look straight ahead (as if it's on a wall) or hold it over your had and look up (instant face lift) - but never look down - it's a grizzly look into your future and it gets worse as you get older!
I love the new post theme"Things I Never Thought I'd Need To Say."
I have many of these myself, like "I can't find my keys! Hand on while I check the fridge!"
As for Lulu - she just made potato soup didn't she?
It looks different in here! I like what you've done with the place!
I've had that same experience. No, not the drinking your potatoes quote, but the double take at how old someone looks, In my case it was seeing my reflection in a window wondering who that woman was.
Not cool. :)
The whole potato thing kinda sicked me out and that ain't easy to do.
So, if you dont recognize you hubby can you make it into a new dating type thing? Is going home with him considered a "blind date"?
Im laughing so hard....I love your stories!
I don't know why I'm laughing; there's too much truth in this for comfort.
Thanks for dropping by my blog, I appreciate your comment! :)
Dahling, You will *always* look better than your husband. It's true for all women.
:-)
Potato pudding!!! That's hysterical!! Gross, but funny.
:-)
LOL! Yes, you should start that blog..."Things I never Thought I'd say to My Children..." Me, today: "Show Mommy where you peed on the floor". ALthough the potato thing is equally, if not more, disgusting. :)
As for the husband thing... My C is in a category far worse. I'm married to someone who could be a contestent on a reality show. THAT is scary.
I won't say which one other than it has the initials "B.L.".
That potato shake is funny! My kids do this all the time. Stir items of food into the consistency of mud and drink it. So nasty! But so funny!
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